Within a graveyard cold and dank, there lives a troubled soul;
He believes all life is dead, and he alone is whole.
When he sits astride his fiery steed, his laughter ringing clear;
The townsfolk stay behind locked doors, for Hallow's End draws near.
T'is seven days and seven nights, till the horseman roams the land;
Are you prepared to face the one who holds his head in hand?
Well, we shall know in just a week, the ones who'll take a stand;
When comes the time for trick or treat, the time for Hallow's End.
Jack-O-Gnomes were well known in Azeroth for the amount of artistic talent taken in creating one. However, there was one contentious point the Alliance and Horde continually argued over. The Alliance wanted to call them Gnome-O-Lanterns, while the Horde wanted to call them Jack-O-Gnomes. A great battle ensued over this small point.
The Horde assembled its legions and prepared for an all-out assault against the Alliance to have them called Jack-O-Gnomes. While they were hurriedly preparing for the battle, the Alliance was busy with yet another boar epidemic and getting bandages for the doctor for the casualties that would follow this massive battle. As the two sides finally clashed over this concept, one man stood alone and stopped the fighting single-handedly. That man was Thomas Thomson, the greatest Jack-O-Gnome maker who ever lived.
Thomas Thomson was sick and tired of the fighting over naming the annual Hallow's End tradition. He stated the Alliance deserved to lose and retreat and the Horde should be allowed to win, making the tradition forever be named Jack-O-Gnomes. While the Alliance initially tried to keep the fighting going on, they realized he was right and retreated once again to a Horde victory.
Thomson was always a fan of the annual Jack-O-Gnome event and the artistry that went into making each one. That's the real reason why he stopped the fight--it (the fighting) wasn't over the artistry of the Jack-O-Gnome, but rather is was about something absolutely insipid in naming the item.
He enjoyed making several Jack-O-Gnomes each year, selling them at massively high prices for both the Silver Hand and then for the Scarlet Crusade. He started with some living Gnomes and carved them into beautiful works of art. After placing an enchanted eternal candle in the carved Gnomes for illumination, Azeroth would feast upon the fresh, juicy, succulent entrails of the Gnomes. It was another peaceful event, similar to the original Brewfest, where the Alliance and Horde gathered to feast upon Gnome and look at the Jack-O-Gnomes with a sense of awe, wonder, and honor.
His Jack-O-Gnomes were highly regarded throughout Azeroth, and people on both sides of the war held his artistry up to a standard nobody else could attain. When interviewed recently, the following faction leaders had this to say about Thomson:
Garrosh Hellscream: If you ever bring up his beautiful Jack-O-Gnomes again, I shall personally feast on your entrails. The Gnomes are watching.
Baine Bloodhoof: I still have one of that Human's Jack-O-Gnomes. He was an honorable man.
Genn Greymane: He once came over the Wall in order to show us the beauty of his Jack-O-Gnomes. The beauty of them brought tears to many eyes.
Tyrande Whisperwind did not comment, but the beauty of the Jack-O-Gnomes brought tears to her eyes. She was sobbing saying things like "They were beautiful" and "Why did the Gnomes do it?"
Unfortunately, the Gnomes and their Gnome Controlled Media couldn't stand for peace in Azeroth. Their first attempt to thwart peace in Azeroth was to substitute Goblins for Gnomes. In addition, each Goblin had a note attached that said, "You use the Goblins instead of Gnomes OR ELSE!!!"
However, Thomson knew of this evil deception and knew that Gob-O-Lanterns would only incite violence in Azeroth. He defiantly made one more set of Jack-O-Gnomes that challenged the establishment. He openly challenged the Gnomes, their Gnome Controlled Media, and their control over every single faction in Azeroth.
The rest of Azeroth stood in shock. They honestly couldn't believe Thomson would openly challenge the Gnomes like that. A deal was struck between the Alliance, the Horde, and then-neutral factions like the Blood Elves, Goblins, and Greymane Humans that would move him from one city to another each week for Thomson's own protection.
It was on his way to Booty Bay one week that the Gnomes struck. Using their Gnomish Engineering expertise, they disguised themselves as the caravan and kidnapped Thomson. Nobody knew where Thomson disappeared to for several days...
After a few days, he appeared on the Gnome Controlled Media in front of an audience of bloodthirsty Gnomes. He was on a chopping block with a Gnome executioner ready to swing an Arcanite Reaper in order to behead Thomson. A fast swing later, and his head was forever gone to a screaming, cheering, Gnome audience. A team of seven Gnomes then carried his body and sprayed the audience with fresh Thomson blood. Many Gnomes were seen on camera licking their fingers to get a taste of a man who was nothing more than an artist. Gelbin Mekkatorque was caught on camera tearing out one of Thomson's eyeballs with his teeth while Gnomes were screaming in near-ecstasy. However, they were not done yet.
Their Gnomish Engineers were working on something called a Undead Reanimation Matrix Flux in order to revive him as an Undead monster. He was revived as an Undead monster without a head and things went downhill ever since. He gave himself a new name--The Headless Horseman.
Now Hallow's End is a haunted shadow of its former glorious self, with The Headless Horseman terrorizing Azeroth. The Gnomes and the Gnome Controlled Media then continued their dominance and turned to creating brainwashing items called Tricky Treats.
|
